


Catching A Crow

by RarePairGremlin



Series: Dream A Little Dream Of Me [1]
Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Alternate Universe - Roommates/Housemates, Alternate Universe - Soulmates, Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Crying, Dream Sharing, Dreams, Dreams and Nightmares, Friends to Lovers, Heartbreak, M/M, More tags to be added, soulmate dreams, unedited
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-11-17
Updated: 2020-02-08
Packaged: 2021-02-07 20:49:39
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 5,696
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21464341
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RarePairGremlin/pseuds/RarePairGremlin
Summary: Tsukishima's known for years. Hinata is clueless until something threatens his link with his soulmate causing the dreams to happen more often.Will Hinata figure it out before it's too late? Will it matter if he does?(Unedited. I just want this written and finished so chapters will be posted after I finish writing them.)
Relationships: Hinata Shouyou/Tsukishima Kei
Series: Dream A Little Dream Of Me [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1547242
Comments: 14
Kudos: 36





	1. Breaking The Link.

**Author's Note:**

> _Dream Sharing Soulmates; You and your soulmate are connected through a reoccurring dream meant to help you recognize/find them. They start out blurry and gradually grow clearer the closer you are to figuring out who they are. Your dreams will hold small clues into who they are, usually through things that symbolize their personality or what they like/enjoy. Once both soulmates recognize each other they will no longer share dreams. If only one soulmate recognizes the other the dreams will continue until mutual recognition. A dream sharing connection can be broken if a soulmate recognizes the other and denies them inside the dream or in real life, even if their soulmate hasn't recognized them yet._
> 
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Tsukishima watched Hinata storm out of the cafe, the door slamming shut behind them in their rush to get away from him. He winced at the sound, flushed as he noticed the barista and the two other customers glancing between him and the door with annoyance and shock in their expressions. Lowering his gaze to the empty mug in front of him he leaned on his elbow and balanced his cheek in his palm. He blinked at the burning in his eyes and tried to remain as indifferent and normal as possible even as he felt the searing eyes burning into him.

He should have expected Hinata to cause an outburst, they were good at it. Too good sometimes. But he’s, mostly, gotten used to their bright, energetic, expressive and loud personality over the years. They’ve mellowed out a bit since High School, but not enough that he should be upset over how they just reacted to his words. 

Sniffling and clearing his throat he rolled his eyes up and blinked a few more times to ward off the emotions swirling dangerously close to the surface. Breathing out he took ahold of the end of the spoon and swirled it through the remaining drops of tea in his mug, drawing abstract lines through the tiny puddle and around the edges. The clink of the spoon occupied his ears so he couldn’t hear the chatter and noise going on around him as much which he was grateful for and the sensation of eyes on him was no longer there. 

Gradually he relaxed into the seat, curling himself comfortably over the table as he leaned into his palm. His eyes remained trained on the trail his spoon was creating long after his mind began to wander through the scene he’d just created. 

Hinata had been pissed when he told them he was moving out just minutes ago and they had every right to be. They’d just renewed the lease to their apartment, the one they’ve shared since enrolling in the same university, and he just broke their deal. With no warning.

When they’d moved in together, deciding that since they were going to the same area anyways it would be cheaper to get a place together, at least that’s how he spun it to sound, they’d made a deal that if either one wanted out they’d give a warning and be open about why. He’d just done neither and he felt like shit about it, but he also feels as if he has no other choice now. 

It’s getting ridiculous at this point, his waiting for them to figure it out. His dreams started before he even went to Karasuno and he’d recognized his soulmate the night after meeting Hinata. The way they acted and that god-awful orange hair a dead giveaway. Once he’d thought their name inside the shared dream everything began to focus and clear and sure enough, bouncing around excitedly before him had been Hinata Shouyou in all their annoying glory. 

He’s honestly surprised he didn’t outright deny them as his soulmate right then and there, has questioned himself about it time and time again over the years but he’d become glad he didn’t. At least he had until the nonstop dreams and holding onto the secret began weighing on him. He isn’t sure when it even started, the heaviness pushing against him, forcing him lower and lower emotionally until he started thinking that maybe Hinata already _knows_ it’s him. That they already know and instead of him being the one denying them as a soulmate, Hinata’s denied him and the universe just hasn’t caught up and released him from the tortures of dreaming yet. 

Which, of course, is ridiculous since Hinata’s been ranting and raging about their never-ending confusion during the dreams. His soulmate’s a dumbass who is somehow extremely dense yet observant, he’s always known that, and yet he still questions why it’s taking them this long to figure it out. Can they really be so dense about it that it’s taking them almost 10 years to figure it out?

Huffing in annoyance he pushed away from the table, his chair scraping across the floor and startling the person nearby with his sudden movements. Standing he quickly left the warmth of the cafe and stepped into the chill of oncoming winter. Pushing the collar of his jacket up he hunched his shoulders and wished he’d been smart enough to wear a scarf when he’d left that morning for work. There was no way he was going home just yet, not after the argument with Hinata. They more than likely had gone back to their place to mope and curse him out in private. 

Sometime’s Hinata would go to Yachi’s but she’s overseas for a few weeks for work and Kageyama’s training all day. He supposes Hinata could have gone to Inuoka’s or Kenma’s since they’re close enough they could walk there in anger without growing tired. No way they’d take a bus or cab, they never do when overly emotional about something. They always preferred walking it off…

“I know too much about them… It’s pathetic…” he mumbled into the material of his jacket as he shoved his fists into his pockets and began walking. Keeping his eyes trained to the ground he let his feet choose his path, ignoring the chill for as long as he could as he continued to lose himself in his thoughts. His fists remained clenched tight within the heat of the pockets, his nails digging into the flesh of his palms. 

While he didn’t think this was all a mistake; him deciding to remove himself from Hinata’s life after so long; he did feel like maybe he should have broached the subject of moving out better. He’d meant to lead into it carefully but once Hinata had sat down across from him it had just fallen past his lips in his usual matter-of-fact way. It probably came across harsh, he’s been told he seems cold and uncaring at times when it’s not how he means to be.

Sighing he raised his head and focused his eyes on the building he was approaching. His steps paused and he shook his head at himself, his lips quirking up briefly in amusement. 

“Figures I’d come here…”

Pushing himself forward he stepped up to the intercom and pushed the code for Daichi’s apartment. It buzzed and the familiar voice of his ex-captain came through in a broken crackle. 

“Hello?”

Swallowing Tsukishima steadied his shuddering breathing, the burning rising in his throat and eyes again, and hoped that his voice didn’t give anything away.

“Can we talk?”

“Tsukki! Of course! Come on up!”

He smirked as he waited for the droning buzz of the door unlocking. They sounded way too happy to hear from him. But… The sound of it made the darker feelings he’s currently feeling lighten a bit. Daichi always had an oddly calming effect on people, despite them secretly being as much of a little shit as Suga beneath their mature demeanor. 

Yanking the door open once he was granted access he stepped into the too-warm compared to the outdoors entranceway. His body continued to move on its own and he was stepping up to their doorway before his brain caught up. He blinked rapidly as the door was yanked open before he was able to raise his hand. 

Daichi greeted him with a wide, toothy grin and he found himself deadpanning at the sight, the pure joy on their face and in their voice over seeing him making him break more than he expected. The tears welled up in his eyes and he didn’t blink them away or roll his eyes up to prevent them. Daichi’s words died in their throat and their face fell into concern. He expected them to question him, to poke and prod like everyone else would. 

Instead, they surprised him by pulling him inside by the front of his jacket. He half stumbled as he was dragged forward, his head hanging low as he bit into his trembling bottom lip. He felt stupid, pathetic and smaller than he has in a long time. All because of that shrimpy idiot who apparently stole his heart inside a dumb, ridiculous dream. He hates them, he hates the dream, he hates this, he hates how it makes him feel…

Arms wrapped around his gently and he leaned into it without a second thought. His head fell into their shoulder and he shuddered out an unsteady breath, softly asking if it was okay for him to crash on their couch before he even realized he’d opened his mouth to speak. 

“‘Course you can,” Daichi hugged him tighter as they spoke into his shoulder. It made him feel like a child being comforted by their older sibling and he found himself wishing Aki still loved close by. Something he hasn’t wished for in a long time.

“Thank you.”

“Anytime.”

They pulled away and he straightened, finally raising his eyes to the ceiling and pressing his tongue tight to the roof of his mouth as he blinked at the wetness surrounding his eyes. 

“Want some tea?”

He nodded slowly. He heard their footsteps grown faint as he took off his glasses and wiped at his tired, stinging eyes, pressing his fingers into them he saw sparks of white. Sucking in a tight breath he steadied himself, giving his shoulders a roll and shake. He listened to the soft sounds of Daichi moving around their kitchen as he shucked off his jacket and shoes. 

Slipping on the guest slippers he rounded the corner shyly, his cheeks flushing in embarrassment as he avoided looking in their direction. He played with the ends of his fingers as he stood awkwardly in the middle of their place, his eyes slowly scanning over their minimal decor and personal items. Daichi hummed away as if nothing had just happened, as if he wasn’t seconds away from having a sudden breakdown, and he appreciated that more than they could know and understand. 

His eyes fell on their couch and he was reminded of his request. He felt guilty, about asking so out of the blue and because Hinata would be expecting him to come home, but he just… He just didn’t want to go home yet. 

Taking the steaming mug of tea Daichi offered he nodded his thanks and followed them when they moved to sit down. 

Just as wordlessly as they’ve been since he arrived Daichi flicked on their T.V., chose a movie and sipped at their tea lie nothing was amiss. Smiling warmly at them over the lip of his mug he willed himself to relax, the safe comfort of their place surrounding him like a bubble. 

He just hoped, no, _prayed_, that he wouldn’t dream tonight. Dreaming meant seeing Hinata, meant seeing them staring at him as if he was nothing but a meaningless blob and leaving him wishing for something that obviously wasn’t going to happen. He needed to move on. He needed to break the soulmate link. He needed whatever this is, whatever they are, to just end already.


	2. The Edge of Change

**Notes for the Chapter:**

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It was childish, even he knew that, but he still slammed every door he touched when he arrived home. He told himself it didn’t count as immature if nobody was around to witness it. Plus he’s not even sure if he’s capable of reigning in his emotions enough to control his actions. He definitely didn’t back at the cafe and he felt like shit about it and knows it’s gonna feel worse later when his anger dies down. 

He just can’t believe- It’s so hard to wrap his head around- Releasing a long-winded muffled scream into his hands Hinata leaned against the back of the couch. He was vibrating, shaking uncontrollably in a strong, conflicting swirl of anger and sadness and he’s not entirely sure why.

Tsukki had decided to move out, which shouldn’t really be upsetting him like it is. It’s not like they’re a couple. They’re just friends. He has no claim on them and vice versa so their decision to move out, to move onto a new stage of their life shouldn’t feel so… So heartbreaking? That doesn’t sound like the correct way to describe it but it’s exactly how it feels. His friend is only moving out yet it’s as if he’s losing something, losing them. Which is so stupid! He’s not _losing_ Tsukki at all! Right?

His hands slid up over his face into his thick, messy hair. He yanked on the strands as he straightened, tilting his face up to stare at the ceiling as his mind wandered through nostalgic memories. Going back to their time growing as teammates, to long study sessions and finally getting Tsukki to admit aloud that they were friends. His mind waded through a slew of precious memories that blended together until they stopped on him screaming at them in the middle of their favorite cafe.

Now that he’s had some time away from them, time to think straighter, not clear yet but getting there, he realizes he’d seen the hurt in their eyes and had still thrown their promise back in their face. Which, yeah, they broke their spoken promise not to leave without giving each other a heads-up, but it didn’t excuse how he handled the situation. 

Cursing loud enough to have a neighbor bang on the wall in warning that he was making too much noise, Hinata slumped over the couch. His face pressed awkwardly into the plush seats of it and he groaned into the material as he kicked his feet through the air. When his neck began to ache he rolled over until he starfished over most of the couch, his eyes closing so he wouldn’t continue looking at the white void of the ceiling.

He wishes Yachi was home, he’d been halfway to her place when he’d remembered she’d be gone for several more days. He’d turned around and intended to go to Inuoka’s but they’re at work. Kenma’s would have been relaxing and they wouldn’t mind letting him vent, except he knows Kenma recently figured out who their soulmate is and is trying to come to terms with it so he didn’t want to impose. 

Yanking the pillow out from under his head he smashed it into his face and screamed some more, hoping it wasn’t loud enough to annoy the neighbors more. The last thing he needed now was another complaint. Not to mention he didn’t want to have to explain to Tsukki why they have another complaint against them. Not that it’s going to matter or be a problem for them soon…

He released the pillow but left it over his face as one arm fell over the side of the couch, the other slid over his chest until his hand fisted his shirt over his heart. He felt a dull burning behind his eyes and a pain in his chest. It took him a minute to realize he wanted to cry. Swallowing slowly he steadied his breathing, willed his now racing heart to slow. Letting the deafening quiet of the apartment surround him he focused on calming down. 

It took longer than he expected. By the time he was sure the brunt of his negative emotions was gone, at least sated in his tiredness, the sky was growing darker. Pushing up to sit he rubbed at his eyes and stared in the direction of the door. His palms smoothed over the cover of the pillow and he wondered briefly why Tsukki wasn’t home yet. 

Deciding that it was none of his business and it didn’t matter, not really, he stood. Tossing the pillow aside, uncaring where it landed, Hinata stalked toward his bedroom. Turning his thoughts to sleep he yawned and mumbled a garbled wish to the universe to let his sleep be dreamless. 

════ ⋆★⋆ ════

Hinata knew the moment he was in another one of his soulmate dreams, the all too familiar feeling of being wrapped in a hazy warmth enveloping him lie a blanket. It’s the kind of warmth that seems to seep deep into your core, it was both comforting and confusing all at the same time. 

Usually, he’d be happy to be here. It had made him so ecstatic the first few times it’d happened, the excitement over first seeing your soulmate, of knowing you have one, was overwhelming in the best way. Even after so long of him seeing nothing but a mess of color and a blurred blob of a person he still gets a wonderful buzz when he’d slip into the oddity of a soulmate dream. 

But he just wasn’t in the mood for one of them tonight. All he’d wanted when he’d crawled into bed, without removing his clothes like normal due to earlier events, was to pass out into the dreamless bliss he normally has. Clearly, his soul and theirs had other ideas.

Sighing deeply he pinched the bridge of his nose, squeezed his eyes shut and silently asked for the dream to stop. It obviously wasn’t going to, but he figured he needed to try anyway. When the feeling didn’t disappear he slowly blinked his eyes open, his gaze focusing on the darkened blurry bricks of the tunnel he always started off in. It took him almost a year to realize it was a tunnel but once he had the fuzzy edges had cleared enough for him to make out the lines where each brick was connected. It had been a nice change, to see _something_ come into focus inside this weird world, even if it was only slightly focused. 

It was always the same, not one detail has shifted or altered over the years. He’s had a lot of theories as to why; that he’s doing something wrong, that he’s simply missing something, that his soulmate has rejected him. He’s even gone as far as to think that maybe they’ve died and he’s going to be stuck in this loop until he meets them in another life.

Kageyama called him a dumbass for that one. Yachi said it sounded tragically romantic. Yamaguchi had sighed and not said anything about it even when he’d asked when they were alone. Tsukki’s response wasn’t what he’d expected. They’d been quiet and had seemed surprised when he’d asked them their opinions when alone.

Tsukki had tsked and asked why their opinion mattered when it had nothing to do with them and they’d walked away. He never asked them again but he’s asked others whenever the subject’s come up. 

He’s been told so many times to just be patient, he’ll know when he’s ready to know, it’ll happen when it’s meant to blah blah blah. Except it hasn’t. 

Still hurt and pissed off from the day he’s had he spun on his heels to face the end of the tunnel, the mouth, ever the same, glowing like the stupid beacon it was. Sucking in a deep breath he bent forward a bit before pushing off with his foot. Unwilling to let the dream drag on and on he sprinted forward until his legs burned and his lungs puffed to keep drawing air into his lungs. Cursing he skidded to a stop and leaned onto his knees as his eyes glared ahead. 

He’s never tried running through it before, he’d never wanted this dream to end so badly before either. He should have known the universe would play this kind of sick joke on him today of all days. The glow at the end wasn’t any closer than it had been when he’d tried racing toward it. In fact; squinting his eyes and tilting his head to further analyze the situation; it appeared to be…

“No way…” he panted as he stood straight, his eyes growing wild with blinding anger as he noticed he was actually further away than he normally was. The glow at the end was always about the size of the volleyball net when stretched out, now it looked to be less than half that.

Screaming out his frustration he turned to the wall and punched it, instantly regretting it when pain shot through his hand and up his arm. Cursing again he stupidly kicked at the wall until he slipped on the water (_since when has there been water here?_) that covered the concrete floor. 

Rolling over onto his back he stared up at the ceiling, his eyes blurring fro the collection of tears welling to the surface. The first sob came out as a soft cough and grew into shuddering hiccups. The sound bounced off the walls into his ears and the sheer amount of raw pain he could hear coming from himself surprised him. His hands rose to cover his face as everything he’d been holding back released.

The water on the cold, hard floor soaked through his clothes. It made him go from too hot to freezing cold in waves, the anger and burning of his sadness heating him until he was sweating while the chilled surroundings made him shiver. He felt sick, literally ill because of it and he just wanted to wake up. He wanted to wake up and leave this haunted place behind so, so badly but no matter how much he wished and begged it didn’t happen.

He’s unsure how long he laid there but eventually his hands fell away from his face and his sobs melted away into soft sniffles. His head felt stuffy, everything ached, the hand he’d punched the wall with burned and he’s pretty sure it was bruising if the throbbing pulse was any indication. 

The sound of scraping footsteps caught his attention but he didn’t bother looking. He already knew it was them. A calmness surrounded him but the bubble he’d formed around himself blocked it from seeping through to him. His sore, watery eyes continued to stare upward at the dark arch of the tunnel and he didn’t move as his soulmate hesitated next to him. 

He could see them staring down at him from the corner of his eye, their hazy figure so out of focus it was as if they were made of colored fog. A tear slid down his cheek and he sniffled weakly.

Finally, they made up their mind and sat next to him, seemingly uncaring that they were also going to get cold and wet by doing so. A hand cupped his cheek, a thumb swiped away his tear and he shuddered. He’s always imagined what it would feel like to touch them, to be touched by them. He never imagined they would feel like ice. 

His eyes fell closed as they gently brushed away the tacky trails of his tears. He still wanted to wake up, almost wanted it more than he had before once they’d shown up. Usually, he’d meet them at the end of the tunnel, just before he’d exit it. It had always felt so warm and loving. Tonight it felt like he was stuck in a freezer and was slowly dying from it. Their touch burned his skin it was so cold, the warmth they were emitting didn’t reach him and he doesn’t remember the tunnel ever feeling so… So _dead_.

When his eyes opened he’d expected to see their swirling, foggy appearance of yellow, purple and blue before him. Instead, he was staring up at the very clear image of his bedroom ceiling.


	3. Vicious Lies

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There's probably mistakes so sorry. I'm currently on a hiatus but somehow managed this chapter so hopefully, it's okay!

“Tsu-” pausing when his voice cracked, Hinata bit into his lip harder than he intended. Squeaking as a throb of pain shot through the abused flesh he cleared his throat, swallowed his words as he took in a shaky breath and tried again. “Kei? Can we… Can we talk?” his voice was small, uncharacteristically soft as he rapped his knuckles against the solid wood of Kei’s door.

When nothing but consuming silence greeted him he knocked again, called their name in the same tiny voice that cracked with emotion again. Still, no sound came from within the room and the lack of noise rang so loud in his ears it was painful, the urge to cover his ears with his hands to block it out, growing as the seconds ticked by. Sucking in a sharp breath he bowed his head, leaning his forehead against the chilly wood to steady the way his body suddenly tilted, as if he could no longer control his own movements. 

Rolling against the door until his back was against it, his head remained drooped in defeat but his fists clenched in determination, he slumped to the floor heavily. His butt smacked against the floor and he’s pretty sure the light crack that echoed through the dark hallway before silence took over again was his elbow when it connected with the wall. He felt no pain though, not physically anyway. Inside his chest, however, he felt an intense, overwhelming pain. One that had slowly crept in seconds after waking from the soulmate dream, or, soulmate _nightmare_. 

It had spread and spread and spread, flowing through him until tears pricked his eyes and his breaths came in shuddering gasps. He’s unsure how me managed to get out of bed and make it down the hall to Kei’s room but here he is. 

Instead of going to his room, unsure if he even could, he balanced himself against the solidness behind him, eyes fluttering closed as a tear spilled down his cheek. When he sucked in another breath he winced in pain, face screwing up as a tingling-surge of what he can only describe as electricity struck through his heart, faltering the beat for a second. Pulling his knees high to his chest he hugged them tight. Everywhere shook, his legs, his arms, his hands. It took all the strength he had left in him to keep his knees close. His head wobbled forward and slammed back against the door, causing it to rattle and disturb the silent void around him, as his lips opened and words poured out.

“I’m sorry, okay? I’m sorry! I’m sorry, I didn’t mean it! Please… Please open, open the door...” his voice cracked and he coughed as his pent up emotions began leaking out in a rush of watery words and droplets of tears. 

There was still no answer. It took until morning when he cracked his crusted, sore, itchy eyes open to realize he’d fallen asleep in front of Kei’s door at some point. It took until the apartment was bright and his stomach ached, demanding food, for him to pull himself up off the floor, a shaky arm holding him up as an even shakier hand turned and opened the door. 

He stared blankly into the empty room, tired eyes empty and expression deadpanned. Bed made and desk tidy, the only thing out of place was a hoodie that was actually his, the one he’d left there the other night when he had come in to bug them about going out for dinner or ordering in. Kei had demanded he leave but he’d refused and they’d given in, letting him stay until he fell asleep while they ordered take out. 

A similar to last night, but muted, shock of pain rolled through him as he pulled the door shut until it latched. His fingers remained wrapped tight around the doorknob, gripping it tightly until the metal warmed. He released a steady breath he hadn’t noticed he’d been holding, letting it rush from his lungs until they were nearly empty before breathing in again. 

When his stomach grumbled again he let his hand fall away from the knob, eyes falling lidded, turning dark with a deep sadness, as he walked toward the kitchen. A kind of loneliness filled him, replacing the pang of hurt, and oddly enough, betrayal, as he made himself breakfast. 

His movements were slow, sluggish as if they weren’t really his and he was fighting for control over them. In the end, he burnt his food and made too much, even for him. Too used to sharing with Kei. Despite the sour taste, he ate the questionable breakfast, his eyes never leaving his plate. 

════ ⋆★⋆ ════

“You didn’t come home last night.”

Jerking at the accusing tone his back stiffened in defense as his head snapped toward the source of the words. Hinata’s back was to him but with his height he could see the way they were curled up on themself. Their knees pulled up against their chest, head turned and bowed down, their chin probably resting against a kneecap. 

With Hinata’s attention away from him he gave his body a shake to rid himself of some of the built up tension that suffocated the room before he answered them, his voice surprisingly steady. A stark contrast to the heavy, unstable emotions swirling through him. 

“No, I didn’t.” 

When Hinata said nothing more he turned himself to face the couch more fully. His lips parted without permission, offering up information that was no business of Hinata’s.

“I went to Daichi-san’s,” his voice held a smugness to it that even he didn’t expect. It captured their attention though, like he planned subconsciously, he supposes, as their head turned a bit in his direction. He still couldn’t see their expression, their usually vibrant hair hiding it from him. He noticed how the stiffened though, as he added, again, without permission, how well he slept and how comfortable it was there compared to here. 

His tongue was sharp, his words sharper in their lies. He shouldn’t be saying it, he knows he shouldn’t be yet he couldn’t stall his running lips nor his stabbing words. His fists clenched tightly by his sides as he remembered how uncomfortable Daichi’s had been. He’d been unable to sleep for the longest time and when he had… When he had it had been…

His tone bordered on a growl when Hinata’s gentle voice cut through and stilled his vicious tongue. 

“He your soulmate or something?”

He nearly choked on the question. The taste it left in the back of his throat nearly gagged him, the quiet, stillness of them pained him more than last night’s dream ever could have. 

“No,” he whispered as his head carefully shook. A burning crept up behind his eyes, but he ignored it. Ignored the way the same heat welled up in his chest and throat as more hateful lies spilled past his lips. “But maybe I want him to be.”

“Good for you then,” they whispered. The sound more like an exhale. 

His fists shook as he fought off the urge to shake them. Willed away the itch under his skin to pull them close and take everything he’s said back, admit the truths and stop the lies. He nearly did, the words bubbling up and slipping over his tongue as they worked their way to his lips when Hinata finally lifted his head and looked over their shoulder at him. 

“I wish you luck. I’m sure you’ll be happy.”

Their expression was so close to the intense, terrifying intensity they used to get whenever they got serious during volleyball that he found himself stiffening his resolve again. Their voice quiet, uncaring. Face blank, uncaring. They honestly just didn’t _care_. 

“Thank you.” he found himself stating as his shoulders squared in fake confidence as his inner voice begged him to shut up. 

“I’m sure he’s already in love with me.” the lie left him so easily he actually scared himself. It was unnerving how smoothly he lied to them. Terrifying just how casually he was able to conduct himself outwardly while he was damn near breaking inside. His inner voice nearly deafening as he screamed at himself.

“I’m really happy for you... Tsukishima.”

All the control he had shattered at the use of his name. Hinata hasn’t called him Tsukishima since… God, it’s been so long since they’ve… 

Even as they stood, expression never changing as they brushed past him, he couldn’t catch his voice. His body trembled as it naturally turned to follow Hinata as they walked to their shoes and slipped them on. His mouth gaped open and closed like a fish out of water, his throat scratching as he forced air in and out in the struggle to make a noise. Any noise. Anything!

“Shou-” he finally managed to choke, his throat catching and swallowing the rest of their name as his voice left him again.

“I’m going for a walk,” they muttered as the door closed softly behind them. And just like that, they were gone and he could breathe again. He whispered, “Okay…” toward the door despite the fact that Hinata had already left. 

“Dammit, Kei!” he scolded himself as a hand raked through his already mussed hair. He hadn’t bothered to brush it before he’d slipped out of Daichi’s place, making sure to have left before they woke. 

Stumbling forward he flung himself over the back of the couch, which still held Hinata’s warmth, he noticed, when his back smooshed into the seat. Rubbing his palm against his tired face he continued to grumble to himself. “You really are a fool… A fool of vast proportions. Truly an idiot.” 

His hands fell against his chest and his drooping eyes landed on a picture of him and Hinata.  
It was a picture that had been cropped down to exclude their friends, Yachi, Kageyama, and Yamaguchi. Hinata had done it and gotten it framed soon after they moved in as a ‘housewarming gift’. He’s snorted and called them an idiot before stating that people don’t buy themself housewarming gifts, others are supposed to give you them. But, Hinata had huffed, cheeks puffing out like a hamsters as they crossed their arms and confidently stated that it was their place and they could do whatever they wanted with it. Including getting themself gifts.

He’d been so stuck on the ‘our place’ statement that he’d dumbly agreed.

“An utter, lovesick fool destined to break my own heart,” he sighed as he let his eyes fall closed. “But it’s… It’s for the best… Isn’t it?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

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